Fly Baby Fly!
For the first time in 25 years, our youngest son is moving away. Marshall recently graduated from Eastern Washington University with a middle school teaching degree in science. He’d sent numerous job applications to schools in the Spokane, WA area, which is close to us, but came up empty.
He recently applied for a job on the west side of the state and that night was offered the position as sixth grade science teacher. Mixed emotions flooded me. I was so happy for him, but a huge feeling of loss blanketed me. My eaglet spread his wings and was truly flying and flying high. Pride hit me. Sorrow hit me. A sense of joy mixed with grief hit me right in the gut, twisted around, and settled in my heart. Honestly, not sure who was more upset, me or my husband. The leaderboard had us in a tie.
My daughter-in-law is from the west side of the state. Moving close to family is important and being close to hers was a bonus. I know she was thrilled as is her family, especially her mother. Me? Not so much. I was ecstatic that Marshall found a job. But to move. Away. My heart felt heavy. We’ve always been close, and not to mention he’s my youngest. We ride horses together, as does my daughter-in-law. Talk a lot. Share our thoughts and feelings. He is my buddy, my friend. And now he’s moving. But isn’t that what I prepared him for? To open his wings and fly?
Still, tears flowed when he called with the news. I was driving to another son’s new house close by. I wiped my face and pulled up my big girl pants. I was so happy he’d finally landed a job. Grown up. Married an amazing woman. But he was moving away. I tried not to cry, but the tears came no matter how hard I tried to stuff them away.
Then I got to thinking about where some of my friend’s kids have moved to. Mid-west. Germany. England. East coast. I made the decision to praise God for blessing him so richly. This is n’t about me, so I through my pity-party out the window. Darn thing boomeranged and came back in the car window and slapped me in the face. I again throughout the self-pity and rolled up the window. It swung around and smacked into the window with a crash. I looked forward, lifted my chin and smiled, knowing God had a plan and he was about to use my kid and his wife in a mighty way.
So today we rode. It was great mom-son time, and he needed to relax after finishing up his summer job and before he drives away to start a new chapter in his life. As I watched his taillights go down our driveway, I smiled, knowing Marshall is on his way to greatness.
hugs… cyber ones until we can spend some face to face, heart to heart time together.
Got them. Thanks. Yes, hopefully soon!
Carmen that is so beautiful! I am trying to type but the tears keep getting in my way. I, too, am so proud of Marshall and Tiffany, but I will miss them terribly!
It will be great for them to finally get settled in to their house, jobs and new life.
Carmen, my own daughter–my only child–just returned from three years working for the UN in Colombia, dealing with former guerrillas on occasion. Prior to that she was in Bolivia making daily visits to men in prisons, and prior to that she worked for a while in a Guatemalan orphanage. When I was in my thirties, my husband and I went off to Nigeria; in order to phone home, we had to drive about 200 miles to another town where you paid in advance for three minutes of talk time, and they would then put you through. My daughter and I had the benefit of almost daily Skyping and internet and Whatsapp. Soooo…count your blessings. Your son has a terrific job, an important one teaching, take pleasure in that…and enjoy those Skype sessions, too.
I can’t imagine, Andrea. Yes, I think of my friends who have it rougher than me and quit feeling sorry for myself. 😉 Living in the mountains we can’t Skype, but a phone call every once in a while will do for me. I’m very proud of his accomplishments and his wifes. They are a blessing. How long were you in Nigeria for? And why, may I ask? I’m assuming for work? What an adventure.
OOOOOh. I always assumed if you had internet, you could Skype. No? My (ex) husband was sent to Nigeria by the British Council ((he’s English) to teach at the University of Kano in the north. We were there for one term, including during a coup so, yes, it was an adventure.
Oh my. A coup. Scary. Glad all worked out all right. You are a blessing to your daughter. Thank you for sharing.
Had tears in my eyes as I read this, Carmen. I can totally relate to everything you write here about raising a son, watching him grow into a man you’re proud to know. You want what’s best for him, but only he can tell you what’s best for him. And if that means moving away, we bite our tongue, hold onto our heartbreak and let him go…
Oh Alice, you made my cry. You said it: bite our tongue, hold onto our heartbreak and let him go… Exactly. Part of being a parent is letting go and letting God. I’m very proud of him and his wife. Thank you. Well said, my friend.
Hi Carmen, You state welll what a mothers goes thru when a child leaves.It is hard and I feel your pain. I told Tiff that Marshall will miss you more than he knows. He will be a great teacher and is a very loved person. You all are in my prayers . Judy
Thank you, Judy. I’m so happy he will have you all there for him. And thank you for the prayers. I’m glad he and I had this time together. I’m very proud of both of our kids! Love you much.
This is such a touching story, Carmen. In your heart you know that you’ve given Marshall the foundation he needs to start a new, solid life. I wish him, and you, the best.
Thank you, Mary. I’m so very proud of him and his hard work. Things don’t always come easy for him, but he’s such a persistent young man. He never gives up!